Shattered Dreams

Lock eyes from across the room 
Down my drink while the rhythms boom 
Take your hands, skip the names 
No need here for the silly games 
Make our way through the smoke and crowd 
The club is the sky and I’m on your cloud 
Move in close as the lasers fly 
Our bodies touch and the angels cry 

Leave this place go back to yours 
Our lips first touch outside your doors 
The whole night what we’ve got in store 
Whisper in my ear that you want some more 
And I jizz in my pants 

This really never happens you can take my word 
I won’t apologize 
That’s just absurd 
Mainly your fault for the way that you dance 
And now I jizz in my pants 
Don’t tell your friends or I’ll say you’re a slut 
Plus it’s your fault 
You were rubbing my butt 
I’m very sensitive 
Some would say that’s a plus 
Now I’ll go home and change 

I need a few things from the grocery 
Do things alone now mostly 
Left me heartbroken, not lookin’ for love 
Surprise in my eyes when I looked above 
The checkout counter and I saw her face 
My heart stood still so did time and space 
Never thought that I could feel real again 
But the look in her eyes said I need a friend 
She turned to me that’s when she said it 
Looked me dead in the face, asked cash or credit 
And I jizzed in my pants 

It’s perfectly normal 
Nothing wrong with me 
But we’re going to need a cleanup 
On aisle 3 
And now I’m posed in an awkward stance 
Because I jizzed in my pants 
To be fair 
You were flirting a lot 
Plus the way you bag cans makes me 
Bothered and hot 
Please stop acting like you’re not impressed 
One more thing 
I’m gonna pay by check 

Last week, I saw a film 
As I recall it was a horror film 
Walked outside into the rain 
Checked my phone and saw you rang 
And I jizzed in my pants 

Speeding in the street, when the red lights flash 
Need to get away, need to make a dash 
A song comes on that reminds me of you 
And I jizz in my pants 

The next day 
My alarm goes off 
And I jizz in my pants 

Open my window and a breeze rolls in 
And I jizz in my pants 

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense 
I jizzed in my pants 

I just ate a grape 
And I jizzed in my pants 

I went to… 
Ok seriously you guys, can we… . ok? 

I jizz right in my pants 
Every time you’re next to me 
And when we’re holdin hands 
Its like havin sex with me 
You say I’m premature 
I just call it ecstasy 
I wear a rubber at all times 
Its a necessity 
Cuz I jizz in my pants 
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants (x3)) 
Yes I jizz in my pants 
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants)